Frequently Asked Questions: How to have a healthy relationship

Past Experiences – A Reason to Stay Single?

In Profemina counselling, both women and men often express the desire for a solid and loving relationship.
And yet, past experiences can sometimes create fear—or even hold us back.
Whether rooted in childhood or painful experiences in adult life, many people have witnessed relationships fail. Even when hope and longing are still alive, these are often accompanied by fears and doubts: What if I can’t make it work? What if I never meet the right person?

It’s entirely understandable to ask yourself: Is a good and lasting relationship even possible? Why am I still single?

But choosing to avoid relationships out of fear of failure—or giving up on the desire to have children because you don’t trust yourself to handle the responsibility—can also mean missing out on something valuable.
Missing out on opportunities: to start something new, to grow and mature, to share something good with the world.
So yes—it’s worth following that deep longing in your heart, even if it takes strength and perseverance.

Our Parents: How Their Relationship Shapes Us

As an adult, you may look back on your parents’ relationship with some distance.
Perhaps they were a strong and positive example—and even now, their advice continues to guide you.
But maybe there are memories that weigh on you, or you witnessed that their relationship was not a happy one.

In that case, it may help to reflect on how much those earlier experiences still influence you.
What might still need healing? Where is it time to make peace?
And what would you like to replace with new, life-giving thoughts and experiences?

Tip: Try not to focus solely on the painful experiences—reflect on the positive ones as well.
What are you thankful for? What moments of light do you recall from earlier times?
What have you learned from past relationships, and how have certain experiences shaped you or helped you to mature?

Your Partner – Positive or Negative Influence? Growing and Learning Together

In a relationship, each person brings their own strengths, weaknesses, and life experiences—all of which can encourage mutual learning and growth.
Your partner can be an inspiring role model, but also a mirror that helps you gain deeper self-awareness.
Sometimes, we only realise what we could improve in ourselves by observing how we react or relate to each other.

But you don’t need to have all the answers or do everything perfectly. In a healthy relationship, both partners grow together and learn from one another over time.

Patience and forbearance are key. It’s perfectly normal to make mistakes—these often provide the greatest opportunities for growth and deeper connection.
Speaking openly with your partner about your thoughts, feelings, and personal experiences can also help them to better understand and support you.

Growing together as a couple also means learning to compromise and discovering what works for both of you. It’s a process through which you grow stronger together, support one another, and deepen your bond.
In a meaningful relationship, it’s not about perfection—but about walking the journey together, step by step.

However, if you’re unsure whether your partner is truly good for you—if they support you and share the relationship in a way that reflects your needs—it may be worth taking a closer look at this:

Is He the Right One?

Inspiring Role Models in Love

Is there a couple you admire? Perhaps their tenderness, their shared joy, or their unity in difficult times?

What about their relationship inspires you?
Which values or attitudes from their life together would you like to see more of in your own?

Such role models might be people close to you—perhaps adults who taught you valuable lessons as a child. Or they may be public figures whose words or actions moved you and gave you strength and hope.

Whether you’re still looking for a partner or already in a relationship, these examples can help you better understand your own hopes and needs.
You might realise that you’re longing for something different—and that there’s room to grow, either individually or together.

In the next section, you’ll find a powerful tip—one that has helped many couples find a deeper connection, and may even help you in your search for a meaningful relationship. :)

Become a Role Model Yourself

Our actions and attitudes affect those around us—often without us realising it.
Even small things, like a kind word or a listening ear, can make a real difference.

Which values are most important to you—in yourself and in others?

How would you like your partner, your family, your neighbours, friends, or children to perceive you?
What legacy would you like to leave in their lives?
Is there something—however small—you can do to make the world a little better?

You have the power to inspire others and leave a lasting, positive mark on your relationships—simply by living as a role model.
Start with yourself—with small, intentional steps that can have a lasting impact.

Wishing you all the very best! 💚