Frequently Asked Questions: Is He the One?

How Can I Tell if He’s the Right One?

You might be asking yourself this question at the beginning of the relationship—or perhaps it’s becoming more pressing now that you’re thinking about moving in together, getting married, or starting a family.
Many women are familiar with the inner dialogue: Is he really “the right one”?
It’s not just about whether you get along well, but also whether he’s the right person to start a family with—and whether he’d make a good father.

First of all, it’s a healthy and important question to ask.
Are you asking because you want to feel secure—perhaps because the next step in the relationship is coming up and you’re looking for reassurance?
Or are you uncertain because something has unsettled you—perhaps a situation or comment that left you feeling hurt or unsure?

That alone can be a helpful pointer. The following questions might also offer clarity:

• Do you enjoy spending time together—and does it leave you feeling stronger?
• Can you talk openly about things that matter deeply to you, even if they’re difficult?
• What challenges have you already faced together? Can you work through differences and reconcile after a disagreement?
• Do you treat each other with respect and value one another’s strengths and gifts?
• Do you support one another and stand by each other when it matters? Are you a strong team?
• Do you stand up for one another—also in public?
• Do you accept one another as you are, with all your strengths and weaknesses—even when that’s not always easy?
• Do you have shared interests or plans for the future? Do you feel like you’re heading in the same direction?

If you can answer many of these questions with “yes” you’ve likely built a strong and healthy foundation for the future.
There’s no definitive checklist, and no one can offer certainty—but listening to your heart and your instincts is always a wise step.

If several of your answers are “no” and if you find that you don’t feel valued, feel embarrassed by your partner, or often wish he would change, it may be worth taking another look at the relationship as a whole.

If just one or two answers are “no” consider exploring those areas with care and honesty—perhaps even talking them through gently with your partner.
A “no” here or there doesn’t mean the relationship is wrong—it may simply be a place where growth is still possible, and where your bond could deepen.

Identifying Your Own Values and Deepest Desires

What truly matters to you in life? What are your core desires—the things you simply don’t want to compromise on?

These are the things that touch your inner being—your most deeply held values and dreams.
Take time to reflect on these, and listen closely to what’s important to you.
The better you understand yourself, the more confidently you can stand up for what you need in a relationship.

If loyalty is one of your core values, then it’s crucial that your partner shares that—or is genuinely willing to commit to it.

If having children and building a family is close to your heart, then it’s important that your partner shares—or is open to—this vision for the future.

Wishing you all the very best! 💚