What Is It Like to Be a New Mom?
Becoming a mother is a significant life event that can upend your plans, especially if the pregnancy was a surprise.
Many women wonder what life as a parent will be like. Thoughts of motherhood can conjure up feelings of dread as well as joyful anticipation.
You don't have to be perfect at motherhood (no one is). So instead, focus on your strengths and the aspects of motherhood you look forward to the most 🧡.
The Beginning — A Positive Pregnancy Test
"I am going to be a mom..." A positive pregnancy test marks the beginning of emotional chaos for many women. What might be the fulfillment of one woman’s hopes and dreams can come as a shock to a woman who had never visualized herself as a mom (until now).
Even though the circumstances surrounding their initiation into motherhood can vary, all women share one common denominator: A whole new task in life awaits them. And very few would say they feel completely confident and ready for it, especially if this endeavor was unexpected.
Remembering that you don’t have to be a pro from the get-go may be a relief. After all, in addition to a new outlook on life, you are given the opportunity to gradually transition into this commitment over time. Many new moms confirm that motherhood has allowed them to discover and utilize previously untapped strengths and abilities.
Think of it this way: While your belly grows for nine months, your heart and head are also given this time to prepare. And even when the baby arrives, growth continues — in both mother and baby...
- 🤔 Still unsure whether you are pregnant? Take our Online Pregnancy Test and receive an initial evaluation!
Just found out you are pregnant? Everything would be new and exciting! Wondering which important pregnancy milestones to look out for?
Read more by clicking the links ⬇️
Things to consider: Check out the links ⬇️
- Dealing with Morning Sickness
- Tobacco, Alcohol, and Drugs During Pregnancy
- (Airplane) Travel
Fun ideas on telling others your news ⬇️
What baby essentials do I need, and how much will they cost? Be prepared by reading these articles ⬇️
No Maternal Instinct — A Bad Omen?
Many women are concerned that, initially, they do not have strong maternal emotions.
It may feel unsettling to a woman who has longed for a baby if the anticipated emotions, such as joy or excitement, do not arise at first. And a lack of maternal feelings may even be interpreted as a “sign not to keep the baby” by a woman whose pregnancy was unexpected.
If this is how you feel right now — you are not alone!
Feelings are naturally fickle and fluctuate even more during pregnancy due to hormonal changes. This can be confusing, as you may not even recognize yourself during the early weeks of pregnancy.
Because your heart may need some time to process this new reality, it may initially block all emotions. Or perhaps you are more even-keeled by nature and unfamiliar with big emotional highs and lows.
Every woman is unique. That's why every pregnancy is different — including emotions and the journey to motherhood. And that is entirely okay! Many women have found that letting go rather than pressuring yourself will allow positive feelings to arise. Even if your emotions take a while to catch up, that is no reason for concern. It does not mean you are against the baby or won't be a good mother. Give yourself permission to come to terms with the pregnancy in your own time.
Positive feelings may arise when you least expect them. They might begin like a quiet whisper and could easily be missed, but are unmistakable because they come from the bottom of your heart. Such profound feelings often defy one’s fear and gloom. Besides, you are more than the sum of your emotions. You are also known by your opinions and actions.
Reliable, caring, creative, upbeat? Maybe you hold other attributes? "What kind of mother will I be?" Find out how your personality affects your parenting by taking our ➡️ Personality Test and receive an immediate evaluation.
Were you hoping to enjoy your pregnancy and share the news, but those around you are still reluctant to embrace it? This letter was written with you in mind: 💌 Pregnant and No Well-Wishers.
Are you feeling down and anxious and suspect you may suffer from prenatal depression? For information and helpful tips, go to Depression During Pregnancy.
My First Year of Motherhood
"A mother is needed and loved unconditionally, but also greatly challenged by a little being who has yet to learn everything."
This is how Sara, a new mom, describes her first year of motherhood.
In the following interview, she shares her story and what she would like every (expectant) mom to know:
What has been the most amazing aspect?
The first year of motherhood brings about a transformation I would have never thought possible. Of course, it is not always a cakewalk. But when you look into your baby's eyes, you suddenly realize what you were made for. All of a sudden, you are willing to love on a much deeper level. It just happens.
What were your expectations?
I am not even sure I had any expectations. You can't fathom what it's like to care for your own baby until the time comes. But, in retrospect, I realize that this experience has exceeded my wildest dreams. My baby's skin is softer than anything I have ever touched, and my heart feels like it could burst when my baby looks me in the eyes.
What changes when you become a mom?
As a mother, your focus and perspective broaden – toward the world as a whole, as well as regarding your own little world. A mother is needed and loved unconditionally, but also greatly challenged by a little being who has yet to learn everything. As a result, your horizon expands almost daily; suddenly, you live and act not only for yourself, but are also committed to your baby's wellbeing and the loving people who are there for you.
What do you do when you feel unsure?
When unsure what my baby needs, such as during a sickness, I have asked experienced moms for advice. This has provided me with vital answers, helping me know what to do. But, to a large extent, you can also trust your maternal instinct.
Can I Handle Being a Mom?
These kinds of questions are common to most women:
Will I be a good mom? How can I reconcile work and family life or other commitments? Could motherhood be too challenging or overwhelming?
Perhaps you are familiar with these concerns — which can undoubtedly rattle you. However, they are also typical, to a certain extent, and show that you have a responsible outlook on your task as a mother. They reveal your awareness that your baby will depend on you, causing your focus to shift toward its needs.
Remember: Previous generations of women probably dealt with similar fears. And yet, being a mother is a natural thing — something you grow into 😉. So, motherhood is a responsibility as well as a gift.
🙌 But what can you do to gain courage and self-confidence so your fears don't get the best of you?
- Every woman has the right to design her path and parenting style — according to her personality and situation! There is no need to compare yourself or become unsettled by the opinions of others. Your family upbringing may also affect your approach. Still, you are your own person and may follow your desires and concepts.
- Many women mature exponentially through motherhood. Often, prior concerns or fears pale in light of the actual experience, and strengths surface, which had previously lain dormant. But before this takes place, gain courage by looking at past accomplishments! By doing so, you can become aware of your strengths. This can help you look forward to motherhood — especially the aspects you would enjoy most 🧡.
- Of course, you may still reach your limit, and things may pile up, causing you to feel overwhelmed. Life can have its ups and downs depending on what you are going through. Honestly reassess your desires and expectations, because life does not have to be perfect to be good. But it is also okay to ask for help. As a mom, you don’t have to do everything on your own. It's wise to know your limitations and when to let others help out in certain areas.
- Looking for resources to make the parenting journey easier? Go to ➡️ Support Near Me.
How Do I Keep My Identity as a New Mom?
Who you are does not change when you become a mom. You can shape your everyday life according to your preferences, doing things you both enjoy.
Of course, as a mother, your focus will continually be directed toward the little person by your side. That is perfectly natural.
Every mom needs time to unwind and preserve her sense of self. Ultimately, this will also benefit her child! So, make sure you take time for yourself now and then!
What do you enjoy doing to recharge your batteries? Drinking a cup of coffee or tea in the morning? Catching up with a close friend? Taking a hot bath while your baby naps? Or simply stretching out on the sofa?
Small rituals are a balm for your soul and don't necessarily have to take up much time. They can also aid in bringing structure to your everyday life.
Quality Time as a Couple
Initially, you may get little alone time as a couple. A newborn needs care and attention. Our tip: Nevertheless, be intentional about scheduling time for the two of you! This could mean snuggling on the sofa while the baby sleeps, getting a sitter and taking a walk, going out for a meal, or watching a movie. Regular times as a couple will strengthen your relationship and help you to weather the storms of everyday life more easily.